Years ago I was asked to write an article for a Homeschool Magazine on character. When I stopped to reflect on this, it occurred to me that when I was growing up, I'm not a dinosaur, but, I'm no spring chicken either......the word character really wasn't referenced unless the conversation was about Disney and the characters. I really began to think, when I went to school and another student was disruptive, they were sent to stand in the hall. If that didn't work, they were sent to the Principal's Office and if that didn't work, the parents were called into the school to discuss options for their child's behaviors.
Today, a school has on staff not only a teacher and principal, but, a social worker and a school psychologist, and all this in an elementary school. The pre -schools all have resources available, too. We are living proof, no matter how old we are that times have changed, the world has changed, family structures have changed, schools have changed, how we attend school, how we attend church, how we attend meetings, etc. You get the picture. Still, I am a believer that when we teach our children strong core values, they WILL grow into a better person. They SHOULD feel failure, but, learn to overcome it. They WILL feel hurt, but, learn how to work out those feelings. They DO see a lot of chaos happening around them, and, WE need to help them process it. I do believe that it's healthy for our children to feel these things, so long as we teach them how to express or internalize them. It's really alright to fail, just be sure to get back up. It's really alright to lose, so long as you're a good sport and you learned a lesson to improve, it's really alright to win, too. As long as you're not holding it over anyone else's head. BALANCE, life is all about balance.
Every adult wants the best for their children, we think we are doing them a favor when we give them a trophy for participation. What have they learned? How will they want to become a better person, to try harder, to understand the platform if they win for showing up. Mind you, showing up is a great start, now help them to grow. Give them the tools to expand, the yearning to learn, the desire to be a better person, the heart to help others and the vision and desire to make the world a better place.
Truly, by allowing our children to feel all the feels is a good thing. It creates a balance, it builds character, it helps them to internalize the good, the bad and the ugly and with the proper tools, they will want to BECOME. Become a better person, become a better player, become better at what they find their passion to be and find who they are and what they can accomplish by being a good person. Nobody said it would be easy, but, it is worth it.
1. When a child has good behavior, they know the difference between right and wrong, it's about choices that they make because they understand what it means.
2. When a child perseveres it's because they know that if they give up they won't learn what they're trying to do.
3. When a child is a good friend they will attract other good friends and become good role models for their peers.
4. When a child has healthy habits they will feel better physically and when they build up their mind and attitude they will accomplish more because of health habits.
5. When a child uses their manners verbally they are a pleasure to listen to and others will want to encourage conversations and learn more through and with them.
6. When a child respects others, others will respect them. Treat others as you would like to be treated is an old' cliche', but oh so true.
7.When a child is responsible they internalize the importance of making good choices in what they do, what they say and who they choose to be with.
8. When a child has self-esteem, they are proud of who they are which helps them to become a better learner and yearn to be the best they can be.
9. When a child is warm-hearted they care about others, they think twice about judging or bullying another person. They WANT to make the world a better place.
Mind you, I'm not an expert, I do however have a Ph.d.
I have PASSION, I have HEART and I have DETERMINATION to make a difference in the life of a child and the world we ALL live in. Let's make the world better together.
My TIPS to you are to be a role model, your child wants to be like you. My TIP is to be a better listener, your child is listening to what you have to say, listen to what they have to say, too. My TIP is to look your child in their eyes when they are talking to you, they will know you're listening. My TIP is to BREATHE, do the best you can, have patience, provide your child the resources and tools to grow. My TIP to you is to enjoy the journey, your child is a gift, take the time to unwrap the beauty they hold and then share it with the world. Your kids are our future. Teach them well.
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Married with children since 1981. Love working with children and sharing the Characters of Character.